4/29/05 -- Wake Drives in the Park-Way

It’s time for Jose Melendez’s KEYS TO THE GAME.

1. In light of his recent quarrel with the Boston Globe’s now former Ombudsman, it has become clear to Jose that if KEYS is going to be taken seriously, there needs to be someone affiliated with the blog whose job is to represent the people, the readers of this fine feature. Thus, KEYS has made the decision to create a permanent KEYS TO THE GAME Ombudsman’s Office. The job of the ombudsman will be to represent the readers. Readers are encouraged to post comments or send questions to keystothegame@hotmail.com and the ombudsman will be certain that they get to Jose himself. This should be quite easy, as the ombudsman will be Jose himself. (Note: What did you think Jose was going to hire staff?) But as an added feature, the ombudsman will periodically, present and address the reader perspective.

Let’s try one.
“Jose, are you hung over? still drunk? I noticed even more typos than usual in today’s post.” Steve-O — Saturday, April 23, 2005 @ 2:44 pm

Well, Steve-O, for the answer to that question you’ll have to wait for the release of Jose’s autobiography “Perfect Jose’s Not” which will detail his hard nights of drinking before day games, his struggles with his weight, and of course David Wells’ copyright infringement lawsuit against him.

Still, you raise a serious question. How is it exactly that a man like Jose, a man with several years of education at the nation’s finest university that has more that 25,000 students and no football team, can make so many typos and confuse so many homonyms? This is sort of like asking how George Steinbrenner, a man with several world championships and millions of dollars could decide that it was a good idea to sign Jaret Wright. And the answer is the same… extreme stupidity.

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